how far would you go to take responsiblity of your mistake

Attended a wedding dinner last sat of a couple neither me nor Rachel knows of, but we were there just to fulfill some family obligations.

The bridegroom was 23 and the bride 21 ...

I am not sure about you, but most pple including myself would come to a quick conclusion before we would find out anything else about the weds..

wah... confirm shot gun...

That comes the almost immediately reply that I would give almost 99.999% of the time.

But as I sat at the table among the self justified to be righteous pple, I had a chance to re evaluate my paradigm of shot gun marriage.

Most pple would argue that s/g marriage is by itself a marriage borne out of mistake and anything with a bad starts leads to a bad end, that it is a publication of diagrace that should not be celebrated and infact shouldnt have happened, that a couple without proper moral standards cannot outlive the strenous requirements of a healthy marriage or marriage decisions forced by pregnancy does not beat marriage decision that is properly considered by the couple,advised by the parents and consulted by a judging panel of relatives who probably determines the feasability of the marriage based on the income of the couple.

Now all the above mentioned can be right, but we often forgot these are mere asumptions of the standards of a marriage. And putting these standards of marriage aside, do we still remember the basic reason/concept behind the existance of a marriage?

a simple search of "what is marriage" on google.com produces the following definition, "the state of being voluntarily joined for life"

Thats that, period

When 2 couple make a serious decision to unite and live their lifes together till death does them part.

So if at any considerson, the couple involves ..whether they are old, young, rich or poor.. is commited to being united with each other till death, they qualify totally for mariage.. whether they have sex b4 or after marriage only determines the quality of the marriage but NOT the marriage.

Who says pregnant woman and a young man can not make a serious commitment to a marriage?

A love Relationship is a decision, anyone firm with this decision qualify for marriage.

That being said, the problem most people have with a shot gun marriage is infact not the marriage it self, but the 'gun shot'.

And in my opinion, thats pathetic...

Whats wrong with mistakes, how many of us could really stand up and be responsible for our mistakes? There is practically nothing wrong with stumbling or falling as long as you can be responsible of your failure.

Imagine, if the couple would be any time less responsible .. then we probably would have 1 more abortion? 1 more broken family? 1 more youth at risk?

And infact, we should appluade this couple .. not for the mistake, not for the marriage ... but for the courage they have to live the best out of their situation.

And we should dedicate a Kallang wave to the parents, who are not only forgiving to their children but are yet supportive and loving to them.



P.s : This blog is in no attempt to glorify shot gun marriage or premarital sex.